The first ever advice column for marketers in distress.

Your marketing guru is here to listen, offer sage advice, and help you breathe through all your marketing troubles.

Let the Guru answer your prayers by clicking one of the articles below:

“ I’m flooded with data! How do I know what to report on?”

My agency is flooding me with a weekly deluge of KPI data that I’m struggling to understand.

Drowning in Data

“ I lost my audience and my bottom line is suffering”I used to be popular on TikTok, but now my audience is gone!

ScreamingIntoAVoid

“Is the marketing funnel total bullsh*t?” My boss mocks everyone who uses the marketing funnel.

LostInBetweenAwarenessAndConversion

“ Should I be on TikTok? Do I really have to be?”A new intern recently joined us and keeps insisting we explore TikTok, as suggested by my agency too.

A Thirty Something Marketing Girl

“I distribute my budgets on auto-pilot…” I distribute my budget according to previous investments, but it feels like guesswork.

SpendingMoneySemiMindlessly

“I have anxiety whenever a new campaign starts!

I know the campaign is beautiful but I still fear we’ll fail.

AnxiousArtsy

“My boss expects more, but I don’t have time for strategic thinking!” My boss wants me to come up with marketing strategies, but I’m too busy!

DriftingOnAChoppyOcean

“I think AI is about to take my job…” My boss wants to start testing automatic content creation.

What does mean? It means this content is locked. The guru’s advice is too valuable to absorb it all in one go. Especially when you are first starting out on this journey. Wait, visit again after a few days and do what you can until then!

Hi, I’m Angie. I was a brilliant marketing director before cashing out my stocks and retiring (very) early. Now, I answer your questions about marketing so I can feel better about myself while I relax on my yacht and pretend to write my first novel. I know you want to read more about me so I added a link.

Tools that will change your life

These resources will make your life as a marketer much easier. They’re available for free. (You don’t even have to give me your data because I have no use for it!)

Get Started With Your Marketing Plan Template

Awareness Funnel Meditation

Bottom up Budget Template

What does mean? It means this resource is locked for now. Don’t worry: you’ll get access to these valuable tools soon enough!

Dear Marketing Guru is a satirical marketing blog with real good advice. In other words: the marketer is fiction, the advice is genuine. Dear Marketing Guru is a creation of Sigrid Dufraimont.